I loved this blog post by Pastor Paul Cain. Note: that is “Cain” not “McCain.” We’ve had some fun with this over the years. I told him that obviously somebody cut the “Mc” off an otherwise perfect last name. Paul is a pastor in Wyoming and does a terrific job as the Wyoming District’s worship resource guy, producing a newsletter called Liturgy, Hymnody and Pulpit Quarterly Book Review, that he has now transitioned over to a blog. I encourage you to add QBR to your blog feed reader. Here is his post on his pastoral “tool kit.” Love it!

On the Road: Pastoral Care Tools in Wyoming

The Weather in Wyoming can confront a pastor with just about anything. It’s snowing outside as I type. How can one make sure he has everything for a shut-in or hospital visit and protect it all from the elements?

Shortly after I was ordained, I got tired of carrying my Bible, Communion Kit, and Hymnal along with bulletins, Portals of Prayer, and other resources in my bare hands. So, based on being raised by a carpenter, I went to SEARS and bought a tool bag. It served me well for nearly ten years until I needed something a little larger.

I am told that “Craftsman” is actually a better translation for Joseph’s vocation in Scripture than “carpenter” anyway!

So, the first photo in this blog post is my new pastor tool kit. I have bulletins, devotionals, Lutheran Service Book, an English Standard Version Bible, the LSB Pastoral Care Companion, and even the pocket edition of Concordia: The Lutheran Confessions on one side. On the other side is my Communion Kit, CDs for shut-ins, and a small kit for emergency baptisms. And it usually makes people smile.

Looking throughh the catalogs, one could spend hundreds or thousands on a new Communion Kit. I saw a nice looking one for $250 that looked like a handgun case. So, I went to the local sporting goods store and re-purposed a handgun case and food safe plastic camping bottles.

So, that is an insider’s guide to pastoral care tools out here in Wyoming. And may a be a good time to remind my brother pastors to be diligent in visiting your people. These are your tools: bread, wine, water and word. They appear humble, but they have great promises attached to them. No part of my ministry has borne more fruit than doing visits to shut-ins, hospitals, nursing homes, and eventually every member family in their homes. My wife calls it “hunting the brush.” Jesus called it leaving the ninety-nine to seek out the one. And heaven and earth rejoiced.

Peace in Christ,

Paul J Cain, QBR Editor

My son, John, has expressed an interest in becoming a pastor and the other day, after he heard me preach, he asked, “Dad, do you get nervous and scared when you have to preach?” It was an interesting question and if there was ever a time when the phrase “it gave me pause” applies, this was that time. I thought for a moment and said, “No, John, honestly, I don’t get nervous or scared anymore, I just get excited and happy. But it wasn’t always that way.”

At one time, I was absolutely terrified at the thought of public speaking. Like many people, I was scared out of my mind at the thought of public speaking. Routinely, studies indicate people are as afraid to get up in front of other people and speak as are afraid of death. I saved my required public speaking class in college for my last quarter, of my last year. During that class I received a revelation that has stuck with me since then. If you are not feeling that “butterflies in the stomach” feeling, you aren’t going to do well. Our professor said, “You better always feel that little tickle and twinge in your stomach, if you don’t, that’s when you should be afraid.” Let me explain. That “fluttery” feeling that many people think are “nerves” is actually the feeling of adrenalin pumping into your bloodstream, and if you don’t feel that, you are not going to be “up” to preach. What I do fear now when I have to preach, or speak publicly, is not feeling that excited “let’s go!” feeling. It’s the same feeling I always had when I got up to bat. Let’s go! Let’s do this! That’s an ok feeling to have.

I think a lot of pastors remain “nervous” and “uptight” because their focus is too much on themselves, and not enough on what they are preaching about. When your focus is so much on “doing it right” rather than what you are doing, you will always come off as stiff, formal, aloof and insincere, and, forgive me, but you are just going to be boring. When a pastor is working hard to make sure he has “covered the bases” in a sermon, and hit all the right notes, the sermon feels rote and formulaic. If you have to think too much about playing the piano, you won’t play it well. Similarly for preaching.

Here are some things for aspiring preachers to keep in mind:

(1) Be yourself. Learn from other preachers, but be yourself. Develop your own voice. Nothing is more grating than hearing a young pastor preaching who sounds just like his favorite seminary professor. And, to be honest, what works for your favorite seminary professor, in all likelihood, isn’t going to work for you. Just because your favorite professor used nouns as verbs, and verbs as nouns, and spoke in incomplete phrases and sentences, doesn’t mean you should.

(2) Be prepared. I do not mean you have to feel that unless you have spent thirty hours each week in excruciating study of every possible meaning and nuance of the verb forms in the text, you have no business in the pulpit. No, you’ll learn that good sermons are not seminary exegetical lectures or “musings on every possible meaning of the text.” But, on the other hand, if you have not given good quality “think time” to your sermon, it will show. You will end up saying the same thing, the same way, Sunday after Sunday. You’ll get bored with your sermons. And if you are bored, the congregation will be too. Some pastors try to excuse their boring sermons by claiming that people are just bored with the Word of God. That’s far too facile an explanation.

(3) Be passionate. No, you should not imitate the Pentecostal tongue-speaker down the road at Family Friendly Church of Happy People, but, if you think the “gold standard” for preaching is the guy you saw at seminary standing in the pulpit reading his sermon in a dry, monotone, well, good luck with that. Sometimes, after I have heard a sermon, I want to shake the preacher and say, “For the love of God, man, why are you talking about the most important things in the world, the most serious of matters, matters of life and matters of death, and the greatest and most glorious good news that there ever in a way that reminds me of a person reading stereo instructions 1?” Everyone has their own style, to be sure. Some people are naturally more dynamic and effusive than others, but if you can’t must a bit of passion when you preach, then, that’s a problem to be overcome.

(4) Be clear. Simple is good. If you can’t communicate your message without relying on a lot of jargon, terms and complicated outlines, you aren’t getting the job done. You are not preaching to impress the most learned in your parish. You are preaching to be understood. If you do not have a clear outline for what you are saying, you will ramble and people won’t be able to follow you. Have a point. Make it. And then stop. Start slow, rise higher, strike fire, retire.

(5) Be real. Don’t assume a “pulpit voice” or “stained glass voice.” I understand back in the days when there was no possible way to amplify a voice, other than to raise it, how and why our pastors developed a booming pulpit voice. And let me say this: If the little old lady in the back row with a hearing problem, can’t hear you clearly, then for her sake and others, speak up! Don’t stand there and mumble and speak softly. But on the other hand, if you sound entirely different in the pulpit than when you speak in real life, you will come off like a fake. If you don’t naturally pronounce the Almighty’s name as “Gawwwd” in real life, then don’t do so in the pulpit. Get the picture?

(6) Be practical. Your hearers deserve messages that are down to earth and practical, not esoteric exercises in lofty rhetoric and literary devices. This is not to say you have to be a slob with the language to do a good job, but if your sermons are out of reach of most of the people in your congregation, then ratchet it back a few notches. Don’t be a slob, but don’t be a snob. You are not there to impress people with your clever turns of phrase and rhetorical flourishes. You are not trying to win a debate contest, or a drama contest. You are preaching, and nothing attracts people to church more than good, clear, practical sermons that speak to where people are in their daily lives and experiences. That’s not my idea, that’s what our Lutheran Confessions say. Our Lord and Master Jesus Christ Himself is the model preacher in this regard.

(7) Be a speaker, not a reader. I know this is a sore point among many pastors, but if you are reading your sermon manuscript in the pulpit, you are not communicating as effectively and as clearly as you do when you are actually talking to your congregation. A manuscript read in the pulpit is a barrier between the pastor and the congregation. They are hearing you read an essay, not preach a sermon. Notes and outlines? Sure, but a sermon is a sermon, not a written essay. Afraid to “go without a manuscript”? Work to get over it. Practice more. Break the manuscript habit. Leave your manuscript in the sacristy, take a brief outline into the pulpit and go for it. If there is something so profound in your sermon that you are afraid you will forget it in the pulpit, then if you do forget it, it wasn’t worth remembering . You’ll remember to say what you most need and want to say. You’ll learn how. Don’t develop a dependency on the crutch of having a manuscript in the pulpit.

(8) Be a pastor, not an entertainer. I’ve seen way too many pastors working hard to get a chuckle out the congregation, telling insipid little stories that have nothing to do with the point of the text, and trying to amuse, titillate or entertain “the crowd.” And it works. Let’s admit it. It works. You can pull the heartstrings of the little old ladies and cause the men to clear their throats. You can go for the cheap and easy emotional reaction, but our calling is to be pastors, not entertainers, to be preachers, not comedians, to be messengers, not manipulators. I’m saddened when I see pastors going for the cheap laugh. Pastors proclaim Law and Gospel. Pastors point to Christ. If your sermon is talking more about yourself, than about Jesus, then please, don’t preach. Don’t underestimate how much your people come to hear a Word from God, not a word from you, or about your family, or about children, or your dog, or the latest interesting movie you’ve seen, or book you’ve read, or what your professor in seminary said when you were there. When I hear a pastor gushing on about himself in the pulpit I find it hard not to shout out, “Oh, would you please just shut up about yourself and tell me about Jesus?!?” Seriously, I don’t want to hear about your seminary experience. I want to hear about Jesus. I want to hear what the Bible readings are all about, and how they apply to my life and what a difference they make. I want to hear about God, not about you. I want to hear about my sin and about my Savior, not you. No offense, Rev. Pastor, but Church is about Jesus Christ, not about you.

What advice would you have, either as a preacher, or a hearer, for an aspiring preacher?

Via Justin Taylor, I read a brief article by Tim Keller who answers a question he is frequently asked by seminarians and new pastors, “What kind of ministry situation would best help me learn how to be a pastor?” His answer might surprise you. It did not surprise me. When I was assigned to be a pastor to a small, rural congregation in Northeast Iowa it was the best experience I could have possible received. And this article will tell you why.

Pastor Peters has an extremely important post up on his blog site. I simply must repeat it here. I can not begin to tell you how powerfully essential the body of a loved one is, to view, and to bury, at the time of death. People think that somehow they are doing something good by an instant cremation or a simple memorial service, with the body of their loved one out of sight. Believe me, it is not helpful. Please consider carefully Pastor Peters’ very wise words.

Funeral practices could probably take up a hundred posts and still we would but scratch the surface. Suffice it to say that the industry is profit driven and that most funeral directors will do whatever the family wants to please the customer. I am not faulting this but suggesting that the goals of the funeral home may be at odds with the Church.

But increasingly we are finding the phenomenon of a funeral in which the deceased is not present. People are doing more and more immediate cremations with memorial services that follow later (often sans even the ashes). In other words, a funeral in which the dead have been banished. But why? Well, there are a lot of reasons. Having the dead present only reminds us that funerals are, well, about death. They make it hard to turn the funeral into a happy event when there is the unpleasantness of a dead body lying right there in front everyone. It costs a bit more and who wants to waste money on a body that is already dead? The person isn’t really there anyway so that body is just a shell that has been outgrown, right?But I am all for having the body there. Even if cremation is the choice, having the body there for the funeral is a good thing. Yes, it reminds us that we have not gathered to remember a life but to bury the dead. But that is the reality of it. Death is real. We can cover it up with pancake makeup, we can dress it up in new clothes, we can make it look like sleep (but isn’t that a pleasant thought — your loved one is sleeping in a casket and about to be closed in a covered up forever), but it is death we must deal with.

The resurrection only makes sense as hope if death is real to us — the thief who steals away our lives… the result of a sin we were born into and added to on our own… the cold darkness that would swallow us up except that Jesus swallowed it up for us…

All our wonderful funeral practices cannot make this reality go away — only Jesus can. And we do not do ourselves any favors by trying to make it appear as if death were not real. It is. It is real and personal. Only a Savior who is as real and personal can address it and steal away its victory.

And we do our children no favors by shielding them from death. We won’t teach them to pray “if I should die before I wake” because we don’t want them to have nightmares. We drop them off at the babysitter so that they don’t have to suffer seeing grandma in the casket. Are we helping or hurting them? Or, by insulating them, are we are hurting them?

I have a vivid memory of my mother lovingly and gently fixing the hair of her Aunt Alice when she died. It did not scar me. It taught me. Like the men and women who brought the spices to anoint Jesus’ body, this was an act of love. Years ago the family washed the body and this duty of love was not only an acknowledgment of death’s reality but pointed to a reality even bigger — of the love that raises the dead to life everlasting. Years ago every home had a formal parlor whose duties included housing the coffin and the dead for the family visitation. Churches has formal parlors for just the same purpose.

I can still recall when my Grandpa Peters died and the pallbearers lifted the heavy casket and body to carry it out the door of the country church and down the hill into the cemetery behind it. I can still see the long line of people who had filled the building in testament to their love for my Grandpa. I can still hear the dirt and the sound it made on the metal casket as the casket was being lowered into the ground. I remember the tombstones of my great-grandparents nearby and other family members as I looked around that day now forty six years ago. These are not terrible memories but comforting ones. Death was real and honest but life was proclaimed in Jesus Christ who is even more real and more truthful. It all combined to tell me where my Grandpa was, who he was a child of God, and what grace supported him in life and now called to him in death with the life only Christ can give.

Let the body be at the funeral… Let the children come, too… Don’t let memories be your only consolation — let it be the Resurrection of our Lord that lifts your spirit. Don’t hide the death in the hopes that it will make it all easier. Let us be honest… honest about death and honest about the life that is ours in Christ. It will help and will not hurt. God promises us this…

Here is an interesting bit of Gerhard shared with me by Rev. Dr. Benjamin Mayes, who is working on the Gerhard Loci Theologici series of volumes. In this particular section, Gerhard is responding to the accusation from his nemesis in these volumes, the Roman Catholic theologian Bellarmine, who accused the Lutherans (and Calvinists) of agreeing with heresies from the first five centuries. You’ll find the particular heresy being treated here to be very interesting: committing the office of the holy ministry to women.

Fourth, the heresy of the Peputians. § 210. (IV) “According to Augustine (De haeres., c. 27), the Peputians give so much authority [principatus] to women that they even honor them with the priesthood. In art. 13 of those which Leo condemned, Luther says that in the sacrament of penance a woman or child can absolve as much as a bishop or pope can. Now, in fact, a woman is the chief pontiff of the Calvinists in England.”

We respond. (1) We do not entrust the ordinary administration of the ministry to women, which the Peputians once did. As for the fact that in an extreme case of necessity we concede to the laity the administration of baptism, the Papists agree with us in this.

(2) Luther is speaking about an extraordinary case of necessity when a priest cannot be had. There, he says, the absolution of a Christian woman or even of a child can accomplish as much as that of a priest. He says: “In the remission of a fault the pope accomplishes no more than any priest and, in fact, when a priest is absent, than any Christian.” He also teaches: “The power to wipe out fault is placed not in the quality of the minister but in the faith of the believer. We must not assign the effecting of remission to any such power of the minister, such as the Papists claim, but to the faith by which we embrace the word of Gospel promise.” On the other hand, he has by no means taken away the function and dignity of the ecclesiastical ministry, for he writes as follows in his Post. eccles., for the Sunday after Easter: “In 1 Corinthians 14 the apostle requires that all things be done in order. But if we all wanted to administer the sacraments, what will become of the order? If we all wanted to preach at the same time, what sort of croaking will we have? We all have the power to administer the sacraments, but no one should rashly take it upon himself to do this except he whom the Church has appointed for this task.” We must believe the same about the power of loosing and binding.

(3) We know that Elizabeth was the queen of England, but that she usurped the functions of the ecclesiastical ministry is the lie of Cochlaeus. Bellarmine is repeating it here. He would have done far better if, remembering that the popess John VIII came from England, he had abstained from the false accusation he makes here.

John Dunne wrote: Each man’s death diminishes me, for I am involved in mankind. Therefore, send not to know gor whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee. I remembered these words when I recently bumped into some perceptive remarks from Pr. David Petersen on how pastors preach against sin. I thought you might appreciate them. It always bothered me as a pastor when I heard people say, “Pastor, you preached what some people in our church really needed to hear!” They were usually always, of course, referring to some specific sin I had mentioned in my sermon. I always took that not as a compliment but as an indication my preaching of the Law and against sin was not encompassing enough, or that I had ground a personal hobby-horse more than I should have. Pastor Petersen offers these thoughts, and I welcome your thoughts on this. Here is what Pastor Petersen said:

“The problem with so much of our Law preaching is that we’re preaching against people who are absent rather than preaching to those gathered to hear the Word and receive the Lord’s Body and Blood. As is fitting with our fallen flesh, this preaching is often wildly popular, characterizes frequently by Dr. David Scaer as the boastful self-indulgence of a “self congratulatory society.” Perhaps it is best seen in the apocryphal tales of old timey LCMS Reformation services where the pastor preached at length against the pope, who never once has attended a Reformation service in the LC-MS. The problem not simply that the Law isn’t heard by those who need it . The problem is that this preaching feeds prejudice and stokes hubris in the hearts of those present. It fails to convict anyone or glorify Christ. In contrast, the Law is to be preached in such a way that the hearers would not turn to judge their neighbors, or those in the church down the street, but that they would examine their own consciences. The hearer needs to be led to recognize his own delusions and self-justifications, to see how his bad behavior is not exceptional but characteristic, that his sins come from inside himself and are a better expression of his true self than the fiction he presents to the world, all of which is to say that he is thoroughly corrupt and evil. This can be a painful and terrifying experience, but strangely, Christians love it. Christians love it because it is the Truth and it glorifies Christ. When the Law convicts us of our sins and we say “amen” to it, it and we, have told the truth. The truth feeds faith, underscores humility, and subdues the flesh. Conviction leads to repentance, a sincere sorrow over sin, a desire to do better, and a desperate hope that there is an escape provided not by justice by by mercy. This is the chief work do the Law: to lead to this desire for mercy, to lead to Christ. For the Law shows the sinner his need for a Savior and sweetens the Gospel by contrast. We preach the Law not to condemn the absent, but to condemn sin and sinners, to teach sinners the hard and humility work of examining themselves, of confessing the pitiful lies we’ve told and our self-absorption, our thousand pretend ways meant to fool ourselves and our neighbors into thinking we are better than we are, to confront what is really in us and who we really are, not as a way of nagging us to better behavior or to make us feel superior to other people, but to show us how great and selfless Christ’s rescue is. Christians love this because it is true and because it glorifies Christ. In contrast, condemning the sins of others is popular, but it does nothing to glorify Christ. Even if the grace of God prevents it from becoming open racism and the like, the only thing it might positively do is glorify morality, and we already have Aristotle for that.”

Pastor Larry Peters knocked this one out of the park. Do you agree?

This is the time of the year when the Church receives many men into the Office of the Holy Ministry. We Lutherans have a particularly beautiful word for the Office of the Holy Ministry, used in our beloved Book of Concord. It is the word Predigtamt, or “Preaching Office.” The man who serves in the pastoral ministry is, first and foremost, one who comes into our midst to be a spokesman for Jesus Christ. Our Lord Christ told His apostles, and all those who would, through the ages, stand in the office of public preaching and teaching of the Word, “He who receives you receives Me, and he who receives Me receives Him who sent Me.” (Matt. 10:40). So, as a congregation receives a new pastor, it should receive the man as One whom the Lord has sent to be His spokesman. As St. Paul says, “Here is how one should regard us, as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God.” (1 Cor. 4:1). Your pastor is the ambassador of Christ, as St. Paul explains of the ministry, “We are ambassadors of Christ, God making His appeal through us.” (2 Cor. 5:20). Receive your new pastor with thanks and joy. Thanks, for the gift God has now given you. Joy, that the Lord continues to answer the prayer Jesus told us to always keep praying: “Pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send forth laborers.” (Matt. 9:37).

Receive your new pastor with understanding and charity. If the man you are receiving is new to the ministry, do not expect him to be an expert in all things. Do not expect him to have the wisdom that comes with greater experience. Be patient with a man who is new to the ministry. He will make mistakes. He will learn as he goes. He will stumble and fall on occasion. Forgive him, even as the Lord has forgiven you. Focus on the Word He brings and the Sacraments He administers, not so much on him and his personality. Some men are, by nature, gregarious and outgoing. Others are more shy and retiring. Every pastor, every man, is unique and different. There is no one “perfect pastor” and no pastor is a clone of another. So, don’t expect your pastor to be “just like” some other favorite pastor in the past. Don’t let your pastor be hearing constantly, “But Pastor So-and-So did it this way.” That gets very old, very quickly. And, if a pastor is a young man, keep in mind St. Paul’s advice to young Pastor Timothy, “Let no one despise you for your youth” (1 Timothy 4:12).

Don’t allow yourself, or your family, and friends, to fall into the trap of making one of the items on your Sunday lunch menu “roast pastor.” Sadly, sometimes people find themselves gossiping about the pastor, or his family. If you have a true concern with your pastor, about something he said, or did, please make it a point of going directly to your pastor with your concerns. Give him the opportunity to hear you out and then give him the opportunity to explain himself and help clear up something you may have misunderstood.

Be careful about playing the “Pastor, people are saying” game. Sometimes when people have a concern to express, they choose to approach the pastor with these words: “People are saying, Pastor…” and then proceed to recount something to the pastor. If a member of your congregation has something to say to the pastor, don’t let them tell you and then encourage you to tell the pastor. Instead, if, or when, you hear a person beginning to complain about the pastor, or offer some kind of criticism, please encourage that person to go speak to the pastor.

Welcome your pastor’s family into your home. Don’t assume “everyone is inviting the pastor over” for in fact, what might be the case is that everyone is assuming everyone else is, and in fact, nobody is. Please make sure your pastor and his family does not have to spend a holiday by themselves, alone, perhaps far from their loved ones. Your new pastor loves you, as the flock over which the Holy Spirit has made him the overseer. Receive him then as a father in Christ, one who has care of your very soul, for indeed he does.

Your pastor is not a mind-reader. He will not simply “know” or “sense” when somebody is sick or hospitalized or needs pastoral care. If you, or a member of your family, need to go to the hospital, do not think your pastor will find out about it simply by hearing about it from somebody else. Please let your pastor know. He wants to be your pastor and bring you the comfort and promises of God’s Word and the Lord’s Supper at those moments when we find ourselves, or our family members, in crisis. Do not hesitate to call your pastor, at any time of day or night, when a loved one dies. He wants to know, right away and to come to your side and support and encourage you at these particularly dark and sad moments when death touches us. Nor is your pastor a miracle-worker, though of course miracles never cease.  But your pastor should not be the “last resort” when your marriage is having problems, or when you face a struggle or problem in your life. You will be greatly blessed by God when you turn to your pastor for the private confession and absolution it is his privilege to provide for you, in keeping with his duties. Go to him sooner, rather than later. Turn to your pastor for spiritual counsel and help when you face issues and challenges that feel overwhelming. He will cherish the opportunity to be your pastor. Let him be pastor to you.

Your pastor may come into your congregation with suggestions and new ideas for your congregation. He may do things differently than your last pastor, or other pastors. And if, in his enthusiasm, he fails adequately to explain what he is doing, don’t become upset or angry. Speak gently to him and let him know your feelings. But also do consider that sometimes changes are good and even necessary. If however your congregation chooses not to accept some of the things your pastor is doing, don’t “go to war” over it. Sometimes your pastor has been influenced by other pastors in our church who have particular hobby-horses they like to ride and axes they like to grind, on all sides of these kinds of potentially emotional issues. Particularly inexperienced pastors are prone to these kinds of influences. Gently make suggestions and where necessary, offer corrections in a spirit of humility. And by all means, do not fault your pastor when he makes use of the approved hymnals and other worship materials from our Church. If your pastor asks the congregation to learn a new hymn it has not sung before, go ahead, learn it. You will never learn anything new unless you try it. There are so many wonderful things to learn from our new hymnal. So, enjoy it and don’t begrudge your pastor’s desire to help your congregation grow in its worship life.

Respect your pastor’s privacy and his family’s privacy. Just because your pastor may live in a church-owned house gives absolutely nobody in your congregation the right to treat the house as “public property” and come barging in to it. If your congregation provides a parsonage, than take care of it and keep it well repaired and maintained. Understand that unless it truly is a genuine life/death emergency, or some other profound spiritual crisis, your pastor and his family would very much appreciate not being interrupted during the meal time, or in the later hours of the evening. Your pastor will need time with his wife and children. They, in turn, will need time with their husband and father. Encourage your pastor to take a day off once a week and to spend time with his family. It is very easy for a pastor, quite literally, to work non-stop, all day long and into the evenings, every day of the week. The pastoral ministry is certainly not a 9-5 job, but don’t let your pastor be so consumed with his work he falls into bad habits of neglecting his family and his own personal needs.

As for your pastor’s wife, here it is very important to understand that your pastor is the man with the call to be your pastor, not the pastor’s wife. Her call is to be your pastor’s wife, and the mother of your pastor’s children. Do not tell her things that you should be telling your pastor. It is inappropriate and not helpful. Do not use the pastor’s wife to relay information to the pastor. Just give the pastor a call, drop him an e-mail, etc. Your pastor and his wife will be very polite, and will probably never tell you that they really would appreciate it if you would keep these distinctions clear. A pastor’s wife will want very much to support her husband’s ministry and will be a loved member of your parish, in short order, but keep in mind that the pastor is the pastor, not his wife.

Pay your pastor as well as your congregation can afford to pay him, not just enough to make it from paycheck to your paycheck. Your pastor has not taken a vow of poverty and your congregation should not treat him as if he has. Never balance your congregation’s budget on the back of your pastor and his family. Take care of him, as is your duty toward him. “The laborer is worthy of his hire” and “Do not muzzle the ox while he is treading out the grain.” (1 Timothy 5:18). If you don’t know what you should pay your pastor, your circuit counselor and district office can help provide good guidelines and advice. Make sure your pastor has time for true vacations. Make it possible for him to get away from the pulpit, from time to time, with a substitute preacher. Provide funds for your pastor to increase his learning and skills, by attending seminars, classes and adding to his library.

By all means, hold your pastor accountable to preach and proclaim the Word of God purely, according to the Lutheran Confessions, even as he has promised to do in his ordination. But even as you do, do not ask or expect your pastor to act, and preach, and teach contrary to the public confession of our Synod. For example, when your pastor can not commune your Methodist aunt, or a member of your family that is not a communicant member of our church, or is a member of a church with which we are not in fellowship, do not fault your pastor for carrying out his duties to be a faithful steward of the Lord’s Supper. Don’t be angry with your pastor when he points out the problem with singing secular pop love songs at a wedding, or not permitting some non-Christian organization from being involved in a church funeral. Don’t be upset if your pastor can not participate in a public community worship service where all gods, and all opinions about God, are treated as merely being equally true points of view. Don’t demand that your pastor act contrary to his ordination and contrary to the doctrines and practices of the church in which he is now an ordained minister. It is unfair and wrong to demand your pastor to “make exceptions” that are actually actions contrary to God’s Word. Don’t expect your pastor to do something contrary to his ordination vows and that would be a sin against his conscience.

Finally, pray for your pastor. Daily. Ask God to guide, strengthen, protect and keep your pastor and his family safe. Ask God to bless your pastor’s ministry. Pray for your pastor as he conducts his ministry. Remember his preaching in your prayers. Pray for him as he makes his many sick calls and speaks and ministers to people in your congregation. And then, let your pastor know you are praying for him. If you really want to surprise and delight your pastor, ask him how he is doing. Ask him how you can help him. Your pastor is not a spiritual superman. He has his moments of sadness and doubt and discouragement. He needs your encouragement, just like you need his. Remember him in your prayers but then demonstrate your commitment to be praying for him by letting him know about your prayers and seeking out ways to encourage him and help him. Recall what God’s Word teaches us: “Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you” (Hebrews 13:17).

May God bless all new pastors and the congregations they serve!